My Ex Started A House Fire, Killed My Dog, And Won’t Reimburse Me For My Things

Location: Michigan

Hi! I desperately need advice.

TL;DR While I was on an out of state work trip, my partner (at the time) started a house fire by hitting his bong and dumping the still hot ash in the garbage can. My dog was in the fire, barely survived, got multiple tumors afterwards and died. I had no insurance, owned 95% of the things in the house, he is claiming it all under his insurance and won’t give me my money.

Context: My ex (we’ll call him “Mike”) has done this thing for years where he hits his bong and dumbs the hot ash in his office garbage can right afterwards. Mind you, his garbage can is 13 gal, so kitchen sized. Throughout the years he’s done this and the can has started smoking. I would yell at him, and he would tell me that I’m overreacting. This has happened around 5 times throughout our relationship.

Mike and I were together since 2017. On Jan 28th, 2024 I went on a work trip. Obviously my dog (Kilo) stayed home. He hit his bong, dumped it in the trash can, and left to our neighbors to watch the football game. it started a fire. His office was completely melted. We live in a slab and all of the vents are in the ceiling. His office is right by the vent intake (in the hallway). It pulled all of the soot and distributed it throughout the house. Obviously the fire in general filled the house with smoke. My dog was laying by the back side door sleeping and inhaled soot for a good 1-3 hours. He had to be taken the to ER and his oxygen level was at 80, so he had to be put on oxygen and monitored for the night.

Kilo (my dog) was 11 at the time. A super healthy husky. You could not tell his age at all. Following the fire his health plummeted. He couldn’t run as fast. I found a tumor on his side, which he had to have surgery for in Dec ‘24. On the literal day (April 13th 2025) we were moving back into our house because it was fixed, I noticed Kilo was extremely sick. We rushed him to the ER and they found multiple tumors inside his abdomen that had burst, and he had to be put down.

The insurance company did not investigate why the fire happened and just deemed it an accident. However, my ex has told multiple friends who’s it actually started.

I blame my ex for Kilo’s death. I knew he was older and would pass eventually but very strongly believe that his pain and the tumors killed him.

On top of this, I didn’t have insurance. 95% of the things in the house were mine, so I would not be covered. His insurance adjuster noticed this and said he’d make an exception and cover all of my things under my ex. It was a horrific process. I’m not sure if anyone in familiar with what happens after a house fire, but there are different phases where they have people come in to evaluate, take things they think can be saved, and then a person to log everything as total loss.

When the company came to take things that they thought could be saved. They clean it in their warehouse and if it’s deemed salvageable, you keep it. Well, for some reason this place decided to take my most expensive things, like a Furla purse my aunt gifted me, expensive designer dresses, etc.

When we went to visit, they “lost” all of the expensive items. The insurance adjuster said he’d replace them in full.

After speaking to the person that comes in for total loss, apparently this specific place is notorious when it comes to losing and stealing items.

Following the fire I hated my ex and blamed him for everything. I tried staying as long as I could and we didn’t replace most items, including furniture until we moved back into our house so we would have to move it.

Once the person completes the list of total loss, insurance shares an online list (similar to Google sheets) with you. They give you the depreciated amount and once you replace the item they give you the remaining amount. You get the depreciated amount in one lump sum. My ex got around $35k. He wouldn’t give me any of the money and I had to threaten him to finally give me $15k.

On April 13th, 2025, I was obviously sick of it and the hate for him grew. Our relationship was very on and off, but he told me if I ever left that he’d keep his word and reimburse me for my things. He said he “wouldn’t do that to me”.

Flash forward to Oct 2025 and I leave him. I can’t do it. He was a bad partner all around and I just couldn’t stick around. Now I’ve submitted a receipt for reimbursement and he is completely ignoring me. I’m not sure what to do. The remaining amount of my things is around 30k.

For context, I’m in Michigan. I don’t know what to do or if I’m able to sue him to get my money, for negligence, or for emotional damage.

The past 1+ years has been absolute hell. I feel like I’ve been robbed and at the same time I feel like I need some sort of revenge for what he did to my dog.

I don’t know what to do. Any advice would be greatly appreciated, seriously.