‘the Hermanos’: 4 Friends Experiencing The Gospel’s Cross-cultural Power

The four of us met more than 20 years ago. In 2003, Chip and Bryan cofounded Unite, a network of diverse Atlanta churches committed to developing authentic and collaborative relationships among church leaders that amplify kingdom flourishing in the city. Tito and David got involved with the network and became leaders a few years after its founding.

After 10 years of consistent engagement and fellowship at Unite meetings, Chip encouraged the four of us to turn our shared laughter, prayer, and fellowship into monthly lunches outside Unite. We’ve since named ourselves “the Hermanos,” nodding to Tito’s Spanish-language background, and we strive to live as true brothers in Christ. Initially, we came together around serious issues in our communities. But our collaboration has resulted in deep friendship. As we’ve submitted to God’s desire for our relationships, he’s done an incredible work: making us a band of brothers.

Below we each share our backgrounds, the challenges we’ve faced, and the blessings gained from our commitment to each other as cross-cultural friends. It’s not been easy, but through Christ’s power, what began as a collaboration has become a life-changing friendship.

Tito Ruiz

I was born in Nicaragua, a country torn by war. When I was able, I came to the United States to reunite with my family. While Nicaragua had economic divides, it lacked the stark cultural and racial divisions I found here in the States.

My introduction to the diverse group of pastors at Unite was eye-opening. It was my first encounter with different denominations and cultures enjoying fellowship and serving together. Initially, I assumed this unity was natural, but I discovered that unity requires a consistent champion. It took great effort and could feel overwhelming at times. At one point, I lost interest and questioned the value of our time together. I chose to withdraw and focus on other pursuits.

My introduction to the diverse group of pastors at Unite was eye-opening. It was my first encounter with different denominations and cultures fellowshipping and serving together.

But Chip championed unity among the pastors. His consistent efforts to nurture our individual relationships within the network were critical. When I returned, it was as if I’d never left. There was no guilt. I realized God was orchestrating something I needed personally and in my ministry.

Though I had no personal issues with people of different races, I soon came to see that wasn’t enough. I became a student of history, and I was able to better understand others’ perspectives and cultural differences. This understanding shaped my decision to plant a bilingual, multicultural church. Isaiah 66:18–21 describes God gathering all nations for his glory, and I believe that God reveals his glory through our differences.

This journey hasn’t been without its challenges—personality clashes, differing viewpoints, even moments of tension and perceived indifference. It would have been easier to grow cynical and give up. But navigating these difficulties has reinforced the reality of our bond. What brought us together wasn’t a game or a program; it was a genuine commitment to brotherly love. Our brotherhood has demonstrated that relationships are possible with people who seem to have little common ground. We haven’t achieved perfection, but this journey, though filled with uncertainty and frustration, has ultimately been rewarding.

Bryan White

Looking back, I see specific moments led me to Unite and, ultimately, to this brotherhood. Had things unfolded differently, I may never have met Chip, Tito, or David. I wasn’t on a calculated search for diverse friendships or consciously trying to find an “Asian American buddy” or a “Latino guy.” Our friendship naturally unfolded and was divinely orchestrated.

My background, however, played a significant role in how I initially viewed cross-cultural relationships. Having grown up in the Jim Crow South, I witnessed firsthand the injustices and inequalities faced by African American people. These experiences, coupled with personal encounters with racism, fostered a sense of anger and distrust, particularly towards white people.

But God dealt with my anger and distrust in an unusual way. He placed me on staff at Perimeter Church, a predominantly white church. This became a significant step in an arduous journey of healing and dismantling the walls I’d built around my heart. Through my relationship with Chip, the Hermanos, and others at Perimeter, God transformed my heart, cleansing me of the anger and resentment I’d carried for so long. My deep-seated prejudice gave way to genuine love and acceptance.

By God’s grace and the power of authentic relationships, my life was changed. My time at Perimeter and my connection with these three men have been instrumental in healing old wounds and opening my heart to the beauty of cross-cultural unity. Our friendship is a testament to God’s power that often brings healing and restoration in unexpected ways.

David Park

As an Asian American raised in the South, my experience of being a minority is ever-present. But that has given me empathy for others who have experienced being “on the outside.” And with this group of men, we all share a desire to see only Christ, not any particular people group, at the center. So, in a way, we Hermanos were all on the outside of the culture as believers.

Through our time together, we experienced firsthand the challenges of navigating multiethnic relationships. Coming from a culture that discourages outward displays of emotion, I was surprised that often I was the most outspoken and angry Hermano. There were times when we seemed to lose our way in Unite, and even as Hermanos. That’s inevitable when a difficult relationship is seen as optional.

But the gospel gives power to persist. By God’s grace, I felt safe to voice concerns and frustrations with my brothers. This commitment to authenticity is how we navigated our differences. We submitted to seeing the good in our diversity and cheering for each other through the challenges. After years of persisting, God, through his grace, has used each of my brothers to shape me. He’s used Chip’s faithfulness in gathering us, Tito’s example as a true friend and encourager, and Bryan’s forgiveness and joy, even when reconciliation is complex. Through it all, Chip advocated for us in invaluable ways, creating space we couldn’t have created on our own.

Chip Sweney

I was brought up in a predominantly white, country-club environment. While I attended public schools with some ethnic diversity, my closest friendships were with people like me. Even after becoming a Christian at age 25, my social circle remained largely unchanged in terms of culture or ethnicity. I took an intentional step toward change when I met Bryan and we started Unite. We began to cultivate a cross-cultural friendship, and Tito and David joined us a few years later.

Initially, our relationships were primarily professional, but they’ve evolved significantly. These three men became trusted friends—brothers. It has been a new experience for me. Through my life until these guys, I hadn’t experienced a deep, authentic friendship with a person of another color or culture. I had no view of life from their perspective. I soon realized that I didn’t know what I didn’t know.

Through my life until these guys, I hadn’t experienced a deep, authentic friendship with a person of another color or culture.

As we’ve invested in each other, I’ve been burdened by the need to initiate and maintain our connection. I’ve been frequently frustrated that we’ll drift without my consistent initiation. Maintaining the group has required effort to keep us engaged, but by God’s grace, pursuing my Hermanos has become a joy. I’ve been transformed through our deep friendships, by our commitment to each other, and by the vision of cross-cultural unity. These brothers have been an important part of my support through painful episodes of significant depression and anxiety.

Through our brotherhood, I’ve gained a deeper understanding of the holistic beauty of Jesus and his Bride. I now long for a foretaste of Revelation 7:9–10 to be evident in local churches: “A great multitude . . . from every nation, from all tribes and peoples and languages, [were] standing before the throne and before the Lamb, . . . crying out with a loud voice, ‘Salvation belongs to our God who sits on the throne, and to the Lamb!’” With this future reality in mind, let’s be eager to build relationships that bridge into cultures not our own.

If our story resonates with you, we encourage you to take a step of faith to pursue cross-cultural friendships of your own. This will require intentionality, humility, commitment, and dependence on the Lord. It will be difficult, but the beauty that results over time will glorify the Lord. As the watching world sees our unity, may they be drawn to Jesus, and may his kingdom on earth more greatly reflect the kingdom to come.