We Helped A Family Member Out, Now They Are Threatening Legal Action Because We Won’t Return “junk” They Gave Us.

Location: Virginia

I have a family member who, admittedly, has been dealt a real awful hand in life. My husband and I have been going out of our way for the last three years to help them get on their feet. They own a house with a cellar and multiple sheds on the property that have essentially become “catch all” locations which are jam packed with random items. At some point, this family member gifted my husband a PS5 that they claim a friend gave them for the airbnb which we thought was a really sweet.

Starting in April of this year, my husband and I worked non-stop to remodel the house to put up as an airbnb so this family member could have a reasonable source of income and get on their feet. We had barely a dollar to spend on this project and they were dead broke as well. To remodel the house, my husband and I footed the bills where we could and the rest could be done with materials in the sheds or cellar which this family member agreed was perfectly fine. While digging through these areas we’ve come across a handful of misc. items- things they called “junk” that the family member gifted us as a “thank you” for what we were doing for them (a sewing machine, some pots and pans, a handful of mason jars etc.).

The original plan was to split the profits and labor 50/50, which quickly fell apart and resulted in my husband working 70 hour weeks to fund the project, me working 70 hours a week doing the remodeling, and the family member periodically pitching in when they felt up to it. My husband and I knew going into this that they’d just been through some horrific things in their life so we had a lot of grace with them. Probably too much.

After six months of busting our asses the airbnb was open and we finally started to make a bit of money, splitting the profits 50/50- the work it took to run the airbnb but still 80-90% me. This was fine at first, I was just happy to be making money again.

By month two of the airbnb I was getting a bit pissed to be honest. My husband and I were exhausted, and we’re watching said family member galavant around going to parties and asking to borrow money to pay for “urgent” things.

Last week, my husband and I realized we were both being asked for money to pay for the same “urgent” things. This sent my husband into an absolute fit. The tension had been building for months and he finally snapped and sent a strong worded text to this family member. Was it harsh? Yeah. Was it needed? Also yes. There have been issues building this entire time and this person is next to impossible to talk to like an adult. We’d resigned to holding our tongues and praying they’d get their act together but everything fell apart with his text to them.

Now this family member is demanding every single thing back, as well as money they claim we owe them and items that didn’t even come from them. We stopped responded to their texts and hoped they’d burn themselves out.

They showed up at our house last night and I guess they forgot we have cameras outside because they grabbed their box of belongings off my porch (mostly clothes they left at my house) and when I refused to come outside to speak with them, they got trashy. Literally. Started throwing all the trash in the floorboard of their car into my yard, kicking over planters, and stole the damn address marker stake out of the ground.

My husband and I don’t want anything from them. They can keep the airbnb and all the money made from it. We don’t want anything we gave them for the airbnb back. We just want this person to leave us the hell alone.

This is the third day in a row I’ve gotten messages stating that they will be pursuing legal action to get their “gifts” back. They’re saying they’ll do other things that I don’t really want to mention here but it’s the legal action part that bugs us the most. Can they even do that? I thought a gift was a gift and we now owned these items.

Sure, we could cave to their demands, however this person is the type who will never be satisfied and will continue to come up with things they want us to give them. If we start handing stuff over, it will only get worse.

I hope all this makes sense, I haven’t gotten much sleep lately because of this and it’s starting to get to me ????