Fatal Life Choices

Location: New Mexico. This story is long; I tried to condense.

Several years ago a best friend of 35 years encouraged me to sell the home I owned for 20 years and rent in an apartment complex where she lived so we could spend our retirement together. Both of us have no families.

The house had been gifted to me but I had become legally disabled at 35 and don’t have a lot of social security, keeping a house up on a small income is hard. I ignorantly got a reverse mortgage. So the money I realized from the sale was as if I had a mortgage balance. The house was In Va.

We got to NM and I really didn’t qualify for the apartment, even though it is low income. The landlord knew I had enough In the bank to pay several years rent so she suggested I write on the application that I received a family trust and enter an amount that would get me approved. This I realize is fraud. But it’s a big corporation and I figured she must know something I don’t, so I did it.

Fast forward, my friend totaled her car my second month there. At the same time I fractured a right foot, so I suggested she use my car till I recovered. She ended up damaging my car for only $3,500 but wouldn’t pay it. And that was the end of a 35 year friendship.

About this time, I got very sick. I was in the Cardiac unit here for a week. I was losing mobility, fatigued, in pain. It was bad. Finally after 2 years of tests I was diagnosed with Lupus, kidney disease, long covid and fibromyalgia. My thinking is muddled and it’s hard to imagine I have a masters because I doubt I could get out of high school now.

A friend in Va. that I had grown up with suggested I move back to Va. get health care from my old doctors and save rent money by staying at his house. He insisted I stay at least six months rent free, but I intended on paying at least $600 a month. It’s a big house, this was not a relationship. I shipped the car back, sold some furniture and moved the rest. I was there exactly a week and he decided it wasn’t going to work out. I was gobsmacked. It costs a fortune to move cross country. (Because I had much of this in writing through emails and texts, I thought I could sue him to recoup some of the $20k I lost in the move. A lawyer who had handled other things for me said no, we never had a contract. Verbal and email wasn’t enough).

Since my old apartment was still empty, I shipped everything back and came back to NM. That jaunt, really hurt me financially. And by now the money from the house was running out. Almost my whole social security check goes to rent. I have been using credit cards for vet bills; dog was a senior rescue so I could not get insurance that was affordable. Now I am at the point of realizing I need to declare bankruptcy.

But not only is the prospect of bankruptcy daunting, but I know renting with one is almost impossible. What hit me now is if I file isn’t someone going to ask how I got an apartment that I am no where near qualified for?

I am not blaming anyone for my series of very bad life decisions that you just can’t make as a senior. I don’t trust my ability to judge people any more, but I also think my deteriorating health with little health care hasn’t helped me stay very alert. Anyone who lives here will tell you NM has a severe health crisis.

Question, how do I avoid getting accused of fraud when I file bankruptcy?