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Can We Just Love?
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Kent State chapter.
The October theory, the April theory, the three-month rule, the you meet the one when you stop looking rule, if he wanted to, he would, window shopping, proximity theory, boyfriend air, orange peel theory, soft launch rule, breakup season.
Everything now, in terms of love, is getting reduced down to a game, a theory or a rule. These are just a few of them littering social media. People often give unsolicited relationship advice, instructing others on how to love correctly and making them adhere to all the rules to attain the “ideal” relationship.
We’ve forgotten the point of it all!
This is not how love works, at least not real love. You cannot plan for it. Usually, you are tripping over the realization of it, having a hard time swallowing the love you find rising in your throat.
This is normal! Your love is meant to be shared. Your love should be felt by everyone you meet. It should be radiating off of you, warming anyone you pass. Because love should not be confined to the rules we are making for it. There are actually no rules in love. Love breaks all the rules, love is every exception.
Not only do the theories and rules plague social media, but dating advice for women always looks like “don’t text back too fast,” “don’t be too available,” “don’t show them you care.” Basically, don’t be too much. But loving is not too much!
No amount of advice can guide and teach you how to be the best at love. You cannot be the best at love, and you cannot trick your way into it. Just because you are so detached or have mastered every rule and theory, doesn’t mean you can scheme your way into love.
The best part about it is that it is so unexpected, so unknown. You can’t control any of it, and that makes it so much more special. It is messy and loud and confusing. Let yourself love fully and loudly. Don’t be afraid to be seen loving. It’s not embarrassing, it’s actually the point of everything.
Mary Oliver wrote, “If you suddenly and unexpectedly feel joy, don’t hesitate. Give in to it.”
So, if you feel love in any capacity, don’t hesitate. Do not worry about breaking the rules or getting the theories wrong. Give in to it.
<p>The post Can we just love? first appeared on Her Campus.</p>
